随心记 Follow mind

从哪里开始说起呢，不如从今天的疫情开始说吧，今天晴天，2020年3月27日周五。波士顿的天气特别好，阳光很不错，如果放在平时户外写作业跑步的人一定很多，街上熙熙攘攘的学生，该是怎么样春天的景象。最近越来越少见人，因为怕传染新冠病毒，我一直呆在家里，提不起精神，体重倒是很努力，稳步上升中。外出购物也是尽量避免，现在外送日常用品，食物成了生活的必备。倒也很奇怪，每天期待快递，外送的到来成为我每日生活的小惊喜。今日取快递时意外发现了寄错的快递到了我的邮箱中，原来是10楼的快递。我借口以还快递的名义，想和人聊聊天，哪怕只是接触接触人也好。我乘电梯来到10楼，敲响她的门，接口聊了两句。和人聊天的感觉真好，与用手机聊天完全不同。冷冰冰的机器好像隔绝了人们真正的热情。 但只要有人聊天就是好的，独居一个人的我能有些排遣。想起今天和朋友微信上聊起的实习和工作的情况未免揪心。今年的毕业生们，找不到工作的大有人在。平生第一次体会到了经济危机时什么。总以为读了研究生，生活工作会容易一点，原来只是以前的自己鼠目寸光罢了，生活真的不容易。父母劝我不要着急，生活工作是一辈子的事。能有本事快速定位自认是好，没有也不能完全自我否定。希望以此勉励吧。 近来对自己的怀疑随着实习的没有着落而日渐加重。原本的老夫聊发少年狂变成了却道天凉好个秋。我真的能够胜任吗，我真的有能力学好吗？但后来想起来那句话，人的成长就是知道可能不行，也去奋力一试吧。我愿努力去做，虽然不聪明，依旧会努力去学。 今天好像就发生了这些事，平淡的生活。窗户外已经天黑了，疫情还有多久呢，天什么时候会亮呢？

Where to start? Let's start with today's epidemic. It's sunny, Friday, March 27, 2020. The weather in Boston is especially nice and sunny. On a normal day, there must be a lot of people doing homework and running outside, and the streets are bustling with students. Recently, there are fewer and fewer people. I have been staying at home for fear of infecting coronavirus. Going out shopping is also as far as possible to avoid. Nowadays the delivery of grocery and food has become a necessity of life. It is also very strange to look forward to express every day. The arrival of the delivery has become a small surprise of my daily life. When I picked up the express today, I accidentally found the wrong express delivered to my mailbox. It was the express of the 10th floor resident. Under the pretext of returning the parcel, I wanted to have a chat with someone, even if it was just to meet them. I took the elevator to the 10th floor, knocked on the door, and had a small chat. It's nice to talk to people. It's totally different from talking on a cell phone. The cold machines seem to shut off people's real enthusiasm.

As long as there's someone to talk to, that's still good. I talked about the internship and work with my friends on WeChat today. This year's graduates, there are many who can't find a job. For the first time in my life, I realized what happened during the economic crisis. I always thought that life would be easier after I finished my postgraduate study, but I just had a narrow vision before. Life is really not easy. My parents advised me not to worry, life and work is a lifetime thing. It is good to have the ability to quickly locate and admit oneself, no and not completely self-denial. Hope so.

These days my doubts about myself are growing . Am I really competent? Am I really capable of learning? But later think of that sentence, the growth of people is to know that may not, also go to try. I am willing to work hard to do, although not smart, still will work hard to learn.

Today seems to have happened these things, plain life. It's dark outside the window, how long will the epidemic last, and when will it be light?

picture from WIX source

#2020/03/27